Thursday, September 18, 2008

Rantings

Hi. It's quarter past 3 and I can't put my mind to work. 2 more hours to go and I'll be heading straight home like always. Today seems like crap. Well actually most of my days are crap. Work is crap really. I know I should be more patience and just deal with it like an adult,
but the thing is I'm tired. It's like I'm coming to an end where all I want to do is nothing. N.O.T.H.I.N.G. Well in that case I rather be stone. All rock stiff. Doing nothing. Doing nothing ain't getting me nowhere. Duh! Anyway just hear me rant.

I've just learned that one of my colleagues is leaving us...soon. Following the footsteps of many before her. That must be a relief for her to be getting out of this rut. If only I could get out of here sooner not later, I would, but my folks won't allow me. Not unless I secured a job somewhere else. Yeah, I know they are concerned and they have every right to express their worries, but I'm 24 now. Isn't it time for me to make my own decision? To ease that up, I always tell myself, parents know best. I hope they do in my case.

It's always the same for me and I'm sure for everyone else. Waking up in the morning which I dread the most and coming to office, turning on the notebook and continuing yesterdays work which never seems to finish, coming home and repeating it all over again. What can be more boring than that? Maybe this is work. I have to get that through my skull. If I gone out soon, maybe I'll have to deal with bigger new problems. Maybe much worse. Crap. I hate the thought of that. What if new colleagues or new user or new work at new workplace is 10 times more terrible than what I'm dealing with? Who knows what the future holds. Human beings are complicated. So complicated indeed. That's a fact.

All I know now is that I'm thirsty for something new, something which I like to do every time I get out of bed every morning, which I love doing over and over again, something that grabs my heart. Still, life ain't easy. It never was, it never is, it never will be. I believe that when you go through an ordeal that can turn your world upside down, that time teaches us to be more appreciative of what life had offered us. Allah knows best. Just believe in Him totally.

Here's a beautiful quote I've found on the net.

"When God leads you to a cliff,Trust Him fully;
Only one of the two things will happen:
Either He will catch you when you fall Or teach you how to fly"

A little tazkirah for the day...hehe!

4 comments:

alfattah said...

sounds familiar to me..huhu..u r not alone..

maylyn said...

hey...hang in there!!! follow your heart just go with the follow. its truth parent knows better for us but sometimes we need to decide our own what is the best for you..(*-*) btw who's leaving???

Asyida said...

Wow, i love this entry! see?thats why i have been pushing you to jot some things here, at least it can ease ur burden on that head of urs.just be patient and keep holding on, there are better jobs lying for you in front ahead, u just have to trust that time heals everything.patient is the key to all of ur answers!

Skinny Legs said...

alfattah - hehe...i know i know...

kak lyn - yeah...tgh hanging neh, ntah sampai bile leh hanging neh. I'm just waiting for dat time to come...

kak syu - hehehe...yeah, it helps bile da luahkan...me being senti...thnks for that...